How to Get a “Yes” from Someone Who’s Set on Saying No

Shift resistance into agreement without pressure or manipulation.

Sometimes you need someone to say yes.

You ask a friend to help you move, get your kid to clean their room, or hope your coworker will take on part of a project. But they’re not having it. They’ve already made up their mind, and it’s a no.

That doesn’t mean you’re stuck. With a few simple shifts in how you ask, you make it easier for people to hear you out, and maybe change their mind.

There are ways to ask for what you need without making things awkward or tense.

Getting someone to say “yes” when they’re leaning hard toward “no” isn’t about tricking them. It’s understanding what’s behind the resistance and finding a way to meet them where they are.

Ask for help, pitch an idea, or resolve a disagreement. The key is to make the other person feel heard, respected, and safe enough to reconsider.

Before you say anything, stop and listen. Most people rush to explain or persuade. If someone’s resistant, they’re not open to hearing your side.

Ask what’s making them hesitate. Let them talk without interrupting. Don’t jump in with solutions. Just listen.

When someone says no, they expect you to argue. Don’t.

That surprises them and opens the door. Say “I get why you feel that way,” or “That makes sense.” This doesn’t mean you agree. It means you’re showing respect.

You want to convince a friend to join a group trip. They worry about the cost. Instead of “It’s not that expensive,” say, “Yeah, it’s a lot to spend. I’ve been thinking about that too.” That response lowers their defenses.

People say no when they feel trapped. Give them a way to say yes without feeling they’ve committed to something huge. Break the request into smaller steps.

If asking someone to consider a new idea at work, don’t ask them to approve the whole plan. Ask if they’d be open to review a short summary or give feedback on one part. That’s a smaller ask, and easier to say yes to.

Vague ideas don’t move people. Real examples do.

If you want someone to agree to a change, show them how it worked before. Use examples they can relate to.

You ask a manager to try a new workflow. Instead of “It’ll save time,” say, “When we tested this with the design team, they cut their review time by 40%.” That’s concrete.

Don’t rush. Don’t pressure. Don’t be vague either.

Say what you asking, why it matters, and what you hope they’ll consider. Then give them space.

People need time to shift from no to maybe, and maybe to yes.